Keystone Skills

There are always things that you want to improve or get better at. But how many of these really matter?

A keystone is the center block of an arch. It is the final piece of an arch that allows the forces to be directed in such a way that arches can be freestanding. Without a quality keystone all you have is a pile of rubble, which is not a very effective arch.

Keystone skills are the skills that will allow you to be successful. You could also call them foundation skills, but there are actually functional rubble foundations, and I don't think that is as compelling a metaphor.

These skills aren't just for your career. These are key for family, career, and life in general.

Life includes family, career, etc.

Continuous Learning#

Our brains are wired to want to experience novelty. [ 1, 2, 3 (local copy) ]. But, too often it is easy to just get into a routine of what is comfortable. If you truly want to be sucessful, you need to learn new things and gain new experiences. This significantly opens up your world, and ensures that you are continuing to stay flexible and mentally agile. This doesn't mean you have to travel, or take up sky diving (although that's on my list), but you need to try to experience new things.

Here are some of my examples:

  1. Read books. They don't all have to be personal growth. Read light fiction. Read anything that brings you some entertainment. It's transporting you to new worlds and experiences for virtually no cost! ( Yay libraries! )
  2. Listen to podcasts. I do have my list, but again, make it things you enjoy. Just not politically podcasts that confirm your biases. Please. Step out of the echo chamber.
  3. Learn new things. Here is a list of new skills I've learned over the last few years, just because I wanted to. They have little impact on my professional career, but they've brought me satisfaction:
  • Laser cutting/engraving
  • 3D printing
    • Running them
    • Understanding slicing
    • Building them
  • 3D design ( Fusion360] )
  • Python (don't get too excited, it was a small project )

Personal Fitness#

From easiest to hardest, here is my list

  1. Physical fitness
  2. Mental fitness
  3. Emotional & Social Fitness

I suspect for most tech workers the order is 2, 1, 3. I'd guess for sales people it is 3, 1, 2.

Physical Fitness#

note

"You can have all the riches and success in the world, but if you don't have your health, you have nothing." - Steven Adler

You just need to prioritize this. Find things that you enjoy, so it doesn't feel like work, but you want to be physically fit. Don't worry about running marathons or going to the Crossfit games. Just make sure that you spend time trading sedentary time for active time. Even if that active time is just walking, you'll be far better off.

Mental Fitness#

I think one of the greatest disservices we have done as a society is to marginalize mental health issues.

If you break your leg, no one tells you to just think strong leg thoughts and get back out there. No, they tell you to go to a doctor where they do diagnosis (take x-rays) and then come up with a plan of care (cast, physical therapy).

But, if you're depressed, you should just "Get over it." Or maybe you should just "Try to be happy."

No. You should talk to a doctor to get a diagnosis and a plan of care. If you have allergies, they give you pills to take and no one says "Boo", but if you can't bring yourself to get out of bed every day, somehow pills are bad. Stop it. Get help. You don't have to do this by yourself.

Emotional & Social Fitness#

As you age, it becomes increasingly important to maintain some element of social health.

Studies have shown that older people who have close connections and relationships not only live longer, but also cope better with health conditions and experience less depression. [ 1 ]

It's hard though, because your natural opportunities for building social circles no longer exist. If you're not working, you lose that one. Your kids are grown, so you don't have their activities.

You need to be deliberate about how you're going to build those social circles. Find a sport you like to do, or do what a lot of people do, find some organizations to volunteer with. Importantly, you're going to need to deliberate about it, otherwise you're going to find yourself in your boxer shorts in front of the TV drinking all day, which in fairness, sounds pretty good some of the time.

Financial Accumen#

Perhaps we will one day live in a "Star Trek"-ian world where we don't need money, but that's going to be well after I'm gone. So given that, you need basic financial skills and discipline

I cover a lot of this over in my increasingly mis-named College Grads documentation, but want to be crystal clear that this is a keystone skill because it gives you autonomy. If you manage this poorly, you put the Personal Fitness goals at risk

But...#

In the end it doesn't really matter, you want to try to be the best you can be at these.

But remember, in the end you are amazing, and you are enough just the way you are.